What do tax abatements, arson, impending snowstorms and toasters that burn a “P” into bread have in common?
If you guessed the “News” section at Philly.com, you win this week’s prize: an entire article of PR for the Philadelphia Phillies!
Well, to be more specific, an entire article of PR for the Majestic Clubhouse Store at Citizens Bank Park. The article lists many new novelty items being sold by the store – the aforementioned toaster that will burn a Phillies “P” into bread, an individual beer floatie, a singing rally monkey, and my personal favorite, “a lightweight ‘Flex Fit’ batting practice cap, with ‘high-tech mesh’ for ‘vapor management.’”
According to Francis Winkey, retail manager at the Majestic, the batting practice cap “will wick the moisture off your head.”
Quite frankly, it is the sort of technological breakthrough that the baseball cap world has been waiting on for years.
But I digress. Not only is this not appropriate for the “News” section, but I’m not even sure if it is newsworthy in any section. Perhaps if this were appearing in the “Sports” or “Living” section of the paper, I would be less likely to dispute its relevance. But no matter where it is situated, it still is nothing more than one giant dose of publicity for the Majestic Store.
I know that the Phillies are a hot-ticket item in this town right now. I know that this is what local papers do when a local business has fun, new products they are selling. But this isn’t any old local paper; this is the Philadelphia Inquirer. I have to believe that the Inquirer – and Staff Writer Peter Mucha – could find a story more relevant than this. HOWL!
– Timothy Rapp